Oh I got good news for myself and for those who knows my obsession-slash-deep feelings for him.
After 9 months of being head-over-heels in love with him, I am finally-officially over him( 75 % I think). Well, I am still attracted-slash-infatuated with him but not in love anymore.
I just realized that I dont want to waste my life-tears-time-attention to him; I guess itll be better this way. Its just that my feeling for him doesnt make me feel good anymore. Gumigising nalang ako most of the time with puffy eyes and unending hopes that one day Ill wake up and hell knock at my door and say that he’s in love with me too. But that wont happen I know. Everyday, insecurities are just pouring down on me like hell that I wasnt good enough for him, that I wasnt pretty for him… and all. Its over.
For the past months I was so devastated with his sudden presence in my life. Through it all I am so grateful that this whole thing happened to me- no regrets after all. I learned a lot and I cant deny the fact that he really made me happy in so many ways. I think God gave me this fair opportunity to give myself another chance to start over.
Hes taken and I know hes happy that way. (No bitterness here). Masaya talaga ako for him.
I know the healing takes time. Its a process after all but I am very positive that Ill surely be fine anytime soon.
On a brighter context- Im still so blessed with so much love from my family, friends and God especially. At least with them, I know that I am fully accepted and genuinely love. Sawi man ako in love life successful naman ako with other aspects of my life.
One things for sure, I wont deny myself to love and be loved again for its not everyday that love comes to smear the most effervescent insignia of my life but this time Ill do myself a good favor, I will fall in love with the right one. It’s best to wait than to settle for the one least available, but to wait for the one who will love me than the one whos just around. Its still best to wait for the right one because life is too short to be wasted on the wrong person.
Special thanks to those (ivory, vanessa, rea, apo, kat, gigs, kenneth, ann, kyla, ces, joe, gox, ciay, mimi) who patiently listened to my stories about him and for all the affirming words when I was at my weakest self. Love you all buddies!
pero sayang talaga siya noh? Haha. Just kidding.
Find a man who is more in love with you than you are with him. This way he will never leave you. At least when youre old you have someone to take care of you.
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hold me now at 2:24 AM
